Friday, May 8, 2009

The eye of the Ti...Beholdaaa

"Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder"
No matter who you are, there is good chance that you've heard that somewhere or the other. Usually being used to point to the fact that different people see things differently. Especially when looking at those "Abstract Art" stuff in painting exhibitions.

So, why mention such a well known thing? Recently, I've had many experiences which relate to that saying. In different ways, learned a few new things. Just thought I would write them down here.

*Its not you, its THEM

Well, one thing I realized was that, no matter with what intentions you say it, people will see what you say, how they want to. Recently, someone on a "social site" made a status update saying that he'll have to shave the beard that he has in his profile pic.

I knew him for almost a year (with same pic mapping the id) but never realized that he had a beard, until then. So I told

"I never knew you had a beard, maybe it was the black BG"
Now.. I was actually referring to the actual black BG of the image and how his face was turned sideways and the beard camouflaged in the BG. But.. that person took it as some kind of schismatic remark with me referring to his face as the "black bg"

Yeah, thats how it works.. it doesnt matter with what intentions you say it, if the other person sees you differently there is good chance of everything going bad. Ofcourse, there are two other basic quotes that you remember at this point, the first being "Think twice before saying anything" but at that point.. even if I had thought thrice I would not have seen that coming!

The other one being "Stop f'ing wasting time on the internet with useless discussions" Yeeeaah.. very famous saying that be... I guess I should keep that in mind very much. These things dont help much but build relations that will mostly not substantiate to anything. Thats what I say now.. lets just hope the condition improves.

*Sometimes.. it IS you.

This is something my mom said recently when we were watching "Are we there yet?". I've seen many bratty kid movies, but the kids in this movie were reaaaaaly crazy.. I had no idea why they were doing those and thought that they were just plain spoiled brats. A common case of "लाड्ला बच्चा being जिद्दी " You know.. గారం బిడ్డా. The part where children are over loved by the parents and they start thinking they own the world or something.

The tricks they were doing had no justification for me and then I couldn't handle it and gave a remark about how crazy those kids were.. then mom said

"They are so nice, they're doing all this to keep their mom safe"

I was totally shocked by this, I didnt even see that angle till my mom said that. I was blank for a moment, then saw the movie with mom's eyes and it all made somewhat sense.. that made me realize how people actually think so differently.

(The movie, however, was a reaaaaal struggle for me to watch.. they even had a part with the little girl singing. I pitied ICE CUBE like anything after watching movie)

*The Beauty of Opinion

So, yeah, because of these and many other events like these, I really started seeing things in a few more angles before saying stuff. The "beauty" is pretty subject, its not actual beauty that the QQ is talking about, its "everything", its basically opinion that it is talking about.

I've always kept the difference of opinion in mind, thats why whenever at a forum or blog (where people know I am not some troll).. I usually oppose others opinion (regardless of what I think) just so that I can get a deeper look into why they think like that how they see things.

These things, might feel kinda useless.. buts thats how I roll :P I like studying people and what they think. Such things make it easy for you communicate with people differently, especially when you are part of a team. You don't want to isolate someone, its not an argument there, so it helps in communicating differently and pleasing them (as always.. regardless of your opinion). I believe, throwing away what you think and flowing with conversations just so things happen is the best thing one can do. Only a bit of experience is what is required for one to just leave away his opinion for a small amount of time, without showing with the face, actions ofcourse!

Ofcourse, this is something you might already know. This is just me, stating the obvious facts on The path to Reeteshification